I Kept A Diary

This article appeared in the March 1959 issue of Motion Picture Magazine

MONDAY :--Maybe I shouldn't have done it - but I did it! This afternoon I bought myself a black sheath dress. I didn't tell Mom what I was going to do because I wasn't so sure how she'd feel about it. Or maybe I was sure, and that's why I didn't tell her! And the saleslady said, "I know your mother won't like it." And I said, "Of course she will." So the saleslady finally gave in! It's a beautiful dress, made of black silk, with a low, scoop neck, an empire waist, and real tightfitting. Actually, what I worried about most were the beads I bought -- which cost as much as the dress! I knew Mom would have a fit, unless I could prepare her for it properly, so when I got home I flew into Mom's arms and cried out, "Let's go out for dinner..." Since I rarely suggest eating out, she was taken by surprise. On the way to the restaurant, I confessed that I had bought some beads which cost almost as much as a dress. "What do you mean by 'almost' as much?" Mom asked. "Well . . . as much," I admitted. For a moment she hesitated, then she smiled and I knew she wasn't going to be mad at me. And after not losing her temper about the beads, the sheath dress came as an anti-climax....
WEDNESDAY--A boy I know stopped by just as I was fixing my fingernails. He insisted we go to see The Restless Years. I told him I'd seen it twice already. Since he hadn't, and had nobody else to go with, I went along. (Oh, cut it out, Sandra. You know very well you wanted to see other people's reaction to your movie!) Anyway, when I told George I'd be ready in three minutes he was shocked. "You aren't going like this?" I asked him why not? There's nothing wrong going to the movies in blue jeans and without make-up. He didn't agree, but there wasn't much he could do about it. Poor George. He's such a sweet boy.

SATURDAY--Went to a party at my girl friend Elaine's house. I wore my fiery red trapeze dress, probably not the most appropriate garment for a Chinese food party! Come to think of it, what a combination-Chinese food and German dessert. They served some sort of cake I can't pronounce. But it was delicious. There weren't many people, about twenty. We danced and played games till someone suggested we go swimming, I've never gone swimming at night. But it was a lot of fun. It must have been two o'clock in the morning when we left. Gosh! it's almost three now! I better stop writing and try to get some sleep.
MONDAY--Sal Mineo telephoned while I was up to my ears in a bubble bath. People always seem to call when you're in the tub, don't they? Mom says I'm pouring too much of the bubbly into the tub, but I feel great when I do. Real glamourous. Anyway, she brought the phone to me, and except for saying hello, Sal didn't let me get a word in edgewise. I don't know anybody who can talk like Sal. "I'm taking you to a premiere and a party on Wednesday," he said. He didn't even ask! "If you have a date," he continued, "we'll bump him off! I'll pick you up at 7:30. That'll give you enough time. And I tell you what you can wear .... "Honestly, even if I hadn't wanted to go with him I wouldn't have had a chance to let him know. Luckily I don't have a date for that night. This promises to be fun. Of course I want to go out with him. Sandy does not have rocks in her head!
WEDNESDAY--Sal picked me up at the house at 7:30. Sal, a studio chauffeur, and a big, black Cadillac! I've never been in a chauffeur driven car before, except when I rode around the lot or went on location. What a thrill. Don't know if Sal was as thrilled when he had to wait for me for twenty minutes to get ready. I couldn't help it. Got home from the studio and still had my make-up on. Well, Sal had a nice talk with Mom. After the movie, Sal suggested we have a bite to eat at La Scala. I told him, "I'm not going to eat anything." He said, "Oh yes, you are," and went right ahead and ordered for me! Nothing ever discourages this boy! I must admit the food was delicious. We ate so much that by the time we got through, it was too late to go to the party.
THURSDAY--My poor poodle-doggie Melinda. And it was all my fault. I had taken a bubble bath this evening, and as usual there were bubbles all over the bathroom floor, so high you couldn't see the tub. Melinda had wandered into bubbleland and gotten swamped in the suds. I was studying on my bed when I heard a thud. I yelled "Melinda!" and rushed into the bathroom. After fighting my way through the bubbles, I found her on the floor, out cold! I revived her with cold water, which made her so happy she rushed into the bedroom, jumped on my bed, slid past me, and knocked herself out again as she flipped off the bed and landed on the floor!
FRIDAY--A boy I know took me to a charity benefit premiere at the Philharmonic tonight. Afterwards we went to Romanoff's, for what he laughingly referred to as "a snack." It was the first time I met Danny Thomas, a wonderful, wonderful man. So funny. I wish I could remember half the jokes he told. Whenever I tell a joke I either tell the punchline first, or laugh so hard because I know what it's going to be, that no one but myself enjoys it.
SATURDAY--I turned down two invitations to go to the movies tonight because it's Saturday: Raymond Burr was on television and I wouldn't miss seeing him as Perry Mason for anything or anyone. I think he is the handsomest, sexiest man I've ever seen. I just hope I won't be disappointed if I ever meet him in person .... Oh, I wish I could meet him ....
MONDAY--When I left Universal today, Bud Westmore happened to give me the wrong eyebrow pencil. I didn't even look to see what color it was when I put it on without a mirror, in the living room. When my neighbor, George, came in and I asked him how he liked it, he said fine. When Mom saw me leave for the party tonight she screamed, "What happened to you? Maroon eyebrows, get that!" I didn't know they were maroon. And then I couldn't get the stuff off, while my date, who was waiting to take me to the Swiss Chalet, grew more and more impatient. When I used cold cream, all my other make-up came off instead. I must have looked a mess. Finally plain soap and water did the trick. Since I had no other eyebrow pencil, and Mom didn't either, I used an ordinary black pencil and it worked beautifully!
TUESDAY--Grandpa arrived last night from New Jersey. I thought it would be fun to take him to Las Vegas tomorrow, but he said no more flying. Wonder how Grandma ever got him on the plane to come out here. He's never flown before. So I took him to Disneyland instead. I take everyone to Disneyland. Poor Grandpa. He was so worn out when we got home. I guess it wasn't very considerate of me to make him try all the rides, but I really thought he'd enjoy it. I'll make up for it tomorrow.
WEDNESDAY--Tonight was a flop. Took Grandpa to Romanoff's and after he had some of their world famous food, he said, "Sure it's good. It's food." Just "food"--at Romanoff's prices! But he was so proud of me when two kids came over and asked for my autograph. His expression certainly broadcasted his feelings. "That's my granddaughter," it said. It's nice to be successful if you have that kind of reward.
FRIDAY--Took Grandpa to a sneak preview of Imitation of Life and I could see he didn't believe the girl on the screen and I were one and the same. Every few minutes he looked at me, then he looked back at the screen, and back to me again, all through the picture. I still feel funny about seeing myself, or for that matter, being myself, as well. Two kids next to me kept giggling and laughing all through the show. I couldn't stand it! I was getting madder and madder, wishing they'd stop it. I finally turned to them, but just as I wanted to give them a piece of my mind, one of the girls asked bashfully, "Would you mind giving me your autograph, Miss Dee?" I felt like two cents. It never occurred to me they'd recognize me.
SATURDAY--Grandma called from New Jersey today--in tears. She'd read in a column that Mom and I had a big fight and thought Mom couldn't handle me any more. It's all so unfair. Mom and I never had a big fight about anything. The only thing we ever disagree about, really, I mean, is that she thinks I don't eat enough. Seems to me when we were out last week at some place on the Sunset Strip, she made a remark about it and we had a little discussion. But that was all. Don't know who built it into a fight and reported it to New York. It makes me mad!
MONDAY--I knew it! I knew it! I just knew it! If there's one thing I can't stand it's opening an umbrella in a dressing room. It's the only superstition I have. It was raining today, and I forgot to close the umbrella just when I walked into my dressing room. I turned pale when I realized what I'd done and wouldn't you know it--five minutes later I spilled nail-polish all over my new slacks. At least I didn't break my ankle, like the last time. When I worked as a model in New York, I was late once for a TV commercial. I ran into my dressing room without closing my umbrella first, threw it on the floor, and as I rushed to get on stage, tripped over it and broke my ankle.
WEDNESDAY--Grandpa left today. I was sorry to see him go. The house will seem so empty. I won't know what to do with myself.
THURSDAY--I must have been talking through my hat last night. Don't know what to do with myself! I have mid-term exams tomorrow and I'm still cramming. Mom brought me a sandwich about midnight, and said that after all these years she still doesn't understand how I can study with both the radio and TV on, although the sound of the TV set is turned off. I can do it, as long as I have enough gum to chew!
FRIDAY--I passed them! Even got a 95 in English. Now if I only don't forget everything the day after tomorrow it'll have been worthwhile.
MONDAY--Yesterday's entry into my diary might have been my last, after what happened today. Driving down the Hollywood Freeway at about fifty-five miles per hour, my brakes suddenly locked! I was thrown against the windshield, which cracked. Luckily, no serious injuries, but I was so shaken up when I got to the studio, I cried for two hours. And I was so worried how Mom would react when I told her. I thought she might take away my car, even if it wasn't my fault. But she was so understanding. Sometimes I wonder if we underrate our parents. I certainly have a wonderful Mom. Bless her.
TUESDAY--Met Gregory Peck at Grauman's Chinese tonight. He's always been one of my favorites--and it must have shown. For the first time since I was old enough to talk--I was speechless. I felt so silly afterwards. He probably thought I was just a kid. Also met Bing Crosby. He's so wonderful, too. Came over and introduced himself. Bing-introduced himself to me! As if there's anybody who doesn't know him.
THURSDAY--I did it again! Had dinner at Jack's at the Beach with Mom and some friends of hers. It got so smoky after a while that I went out into the parking lot and sat in our car. As usual when I'm alone, I started talking to myself! This time I was doing a scene from the movie I'm doing now with Audie Murphy, The Buckskin Kid and the Calico Girl,(*NOTE: Title of this movie was changed to "The Wild and Innocent") playing both Audie's part and mine, with laughter, tears, and all. I wasn't even conscious that half a dozen people lined up and watched me, from a distance. I thought I'd die! I ran right back into the restaurant. I also learned a lesson tonight. I never ate squash before--because I didn't like the sound of it. Tonight Mom ordered for me, while I was in the car. When I commented how much I liked the vegetable, she confessed it was squash. That should teach me never to turn down anything till I try it. Come to think of it--I'd never have eaten grasshoppers and ants in Paris had anyone told me ahead of time what it was!

SATURDAY--I received the sweetest and saddest fan letter today, from a boy who wrote, "I think of you all the time since I saw you in a picture. The trouble is, I thought of you yesterday while I was skating-fell-and broke both legs. But I'm not mad at you. Just mad about you."
And tonight... tonight I will never, never forget. Perry Mason, Raymond Burr, fellas, I may not be spending so many Saturday evenings with you after all . . . tonight I went out with (------)--and I was kissed for the first time in my life! I mean really kissed, not in front of the cameras, not acting a part, not kissing as part of my work as an actress. I always wondered if this other kind of kissing would be different. It sure was. It sure is. When I came home from my date, Mom said, "You look like the cat who swallowed the canary." I could feel the blush that spread over my face. I told Mom all about it .... I don't think any kiss will ever mean as much to me.
Dear Diary, do you suppose I'm right?

Sandra Dee stars in Imitation of Life for UI and Gidget for Columbia.

Back to Sandra Dee tribute